4th Ingredient

COMMUNICATION IN THE BIOLOGICAL SCIENCES
Department of Biology

START EACH PARAGRAPH WITH A CLEAR TOPIC SENTENCE FOLLOWED BY SENTENCES THAT MAINTAIN A CLEAR FLOW OF IDEAS

In the following example, vegetation data were collected in two different ways -- using transects and aerial photography.

Consider the follow paragraph:

"Our study suggested that the transect data and the aerial photography data were consistent with one another. The transect data showed an increase in marsh species while the aerial photography showed that these species declined. Both techniques showed that the number of submersed species increased in control and drawdown areas."

The first sentence of a paragraph may be called the "topic sentence." The paragraph above starts with a nice topic sentence, although the logical flow of ideas is broken later on in the paragraph by the second sentence. In fact, this second sentence contradicts the topic sentence!

1. One valid revision -- omit the offending sentence:

"Our study suggested that the transect data and the aerial photography data were consistent with one another. Both techniques showed that the number of submersed species increased in control and drawdown areas."

2. A different valid revision -- rewrite the topic sentence so that it logically includes all of the ideas covered in the paragraph:

"The two methods used in this study yielded results that were inconsistent with one another. The transect data showed an increase in submersed plant species while aerial photography showed that these species declined. However, both techniques showed that the number of submersed species increased."

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