Dean Jones says:

"Well, then let's 'split the difference':  I'll agree to TWO graduate research assistants for the next TWO years, if you agree to supervise THREE independent-study-type undergraduate research projects each year during the next two years.  I'm keen on establishing our college as a bastion for undergraduate research and you can help with that effort."

Your response:

1.  "I accept your kind and generous offer."

2. "While I am sympathetic to your desire to see undergraduate research thrive here, I've got my own research to pursue.  No deal.  I'll simply forgo the graduate research assistants."

3. "While I am sympathetic to your desire to see undergraduate research thrive here, I've got my own research to pursue.  If I don't publish in top-tier journals, I might not get tenure.  Do you think that supervising several undergraduate research projects is the best use of my time?"