Dean Jones says:

"We can always hire other candidates -- or part-time teaching faculty.  Of course, we do want to hire good teachers, like you. 

Suppose that we give you three guaranteed conference trips.  Will that get this deal done?" 

Your response:

1.  I'll accept your offer.

2.  The salary is still too low.

3.  I want to have my own "grader" so I can focus on research.