Dean Jones says:

I see absolutely no reason to "split the difference" and give a fresh Ph.D. such an outrageously high salary.  The 64th percentile is sufficiently high when combined with the higher hardware and software allowances to meet your needs.  If that is not sufficient, perhaps we should discontinue this conversation.

To reiterate, this is the new contract package I'd like to offer you:

**ONE guaranteed trip to a conference each year for two years

**$1,200 for software to analyze data

**$12,000 for hardware (i.e., special computer processor and other equipment)

**A nine-month salary at the 64th percentile

**Required to teach three summer sessions, none of which count toward your teaching load

**Three-day a week teaching schedule."

Your response:

1. I accept your kind and generous offer.

2. Make it the 69th percentile and you've got yourself a deal.

3. Make it $1,500 for software and you've got yourself a deal.

4. I'm sorry, but you'll have to do better than that!

5. Make it so that I have two-days-a-week teaching schedule and you've got yourself a deal.