Dean Jones says:

"Another excellent question!

Yes, the candidate has to be a good, productive researcher.

 

Let me look over your materials again...

(You sit in silence as he again studies your file)...

 

Yes, I see you have several publications, including a few in excellent journals.  I also see that you won a "Best Paper" award at at conference.  Quite impressive!

I'll raise my offer from the 66th percentile to the 86th percentile.

I'll also raise your software and hardware allocations.  This will facilitate your research, because those come from a different part of my budget.  Finally, I'll arrange it so that you teach only TWO summer sessions instead of three.  That way you have more time to write. 

Your response:

1.  I accept your offer.

2.  What about "service" -- like community service, professional service, and university service?